Fear

"It", by Stephen King, a simply harmless book( or movie) but to the small mind of the child, that clown poisons the depths of their mind, haunting them throughout their lives. Coulrophobia, the fear of clowns, affects mostly children, but also some teens and adults. I, myself, found out at the young age of four how scary clowns can be, simply by walking upstairs while my parents were watching "It". For the longest time I was convinced that a clown was going to break into my room and eat off my flesh. Realistically- now at least- I realise that its not likely that a clown would come into my room and try to kill me- let alone eat my flesh- however having people like John Wayne Gacy or “The Clown Killer” didn’t help my fears at all. Gacy liked to dress up as a clown to lure small children with him, so he could kill him. He was not a help to my case. Even with the knowledge of the irrationality of being afraid of clowns, the fear still grips me today, and though now I can at least see a picture of a clown, I’ve stayed as far away from Circuses as I can. In the Lord Of The Files I can relate to the fear and horror those boys feel when dealing with the “beastie” because even if the fear they have is irrational, they still fear it –even Ralph- despite knowing that there isn’t any actual harm. Just knowing that there's a slight chance that something could be out there – much like myself and Gacy (even though his victims were boys) – gives the boys the fear.

I've always used computers mainly to mess around, or just chat with my friends. This semester of English I've figured out many more ways to express what I believe and have the world take it as a reliable source. Usually when online people don't take into account spelling or proper word use, but really all that does is make people look foolish and uneducated. Using sites like blogger, wikispaces and shelfari.com have really helped with my ability to type a well-written paragraph that not only looks nice, but also reads properly so I can be fully understood over the World Wide Web. Not only has it helped improve my writing ability but it has also showed me many web sites that I can compare books with others around the world. Yes, I'm talking about Shelfari. Shelfari is a tool that I plan to use for - well - a very long time. It’s already helped me find amazing books to read, and I've only had an account for about two days. The website also offers a chance to review and read other members reviews on books so that one can find a good book depending on what they like to read. For the most part, the reviews on this website are all intelligent and helpful. Wikispaces has also opened a whole new world of writing and creative presentations to me. The page can be used basically like your own website (since that’s what it is) to share information and other things to people who may not know anything about a subject. The last thing that has really helped in English 11 is google.docs. This helped immensly with getting a paper back and forth between me and my peer editior. It was quick and simple.

First Post.

Daggers appear in almost every persons smile at one point in time. I know for myself I've sent those daggers out on unsuspecting people numerous amounts of time. I can also think of times when people sent the daggers my way. One time I think of more then any happened not too long ago when I was a sophomore I lashed out on one of my very good friends-lets call her friend A- who in no way actually deserved it. It was during Concert Band the only class we actually shared together. I had heard a rumor that friend A had said some things about one of our mutual friends (friend B). Friend A had also started drifting away from me, talking to me less and less. Naturally, I hadn't the slightest clue why, but as the day progressed friend B told me it was because friend A had decided that friend B had me and anther one of our friends on “leashes” and was making our decisions for us. Of course hearing this news I was royally pissed off at friend A because I was foolish enough to believe friend B. So, I ended up confronting friend A, and after all the stress and other stuff she'd been through with friend B my anger towards her pushed her over the edge, and I made her cry. Friend B, however; looked at our crying friend A, and I swear for a moment she smiled, and the daggers showed through. Afterwards however, she yelled at me, told me I was a horrible person, and went to apologies to friend A. The two became hesitant friends again while I stood on the outside feeling horrible and sad about what I had said. However, my angst was short-lived. No more then two weeks later, friend B went and started the whole petty argument over again. That smile showing through once again. I again acted naive and fell for friend B's game again - this time however just ignoring friend A instead of confronting her. Quite recently I began talking to friend A again. It’s turned out for the better, because friend B's smile came back. This time however instead of being directed at friend A, it fell on me. That's where my and friend B's friendship ended.